


Losing Footing

by littletechiebird



Category: Marvel, Young Avengers
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-03-30
Updated: 2012-03-30
Packaged: 2017-11-02 18:28:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/372019
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/littletechiebird/pseuds/littletechiebird





	Losing Footing

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Untitled](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/7553) by Julie/Kaciart. 



It was racing through him like wildfire. The hot tendrils of anger clawing from his veins and his chest to crawl over his skin. The sheer power that was behind his emotion made the air around him heavy, tense, making his cape rise from his shoulders and flutter to graze against fabric and skin. The glow that ghosted from his eyes was a shivering image. The anger itself had a peculiar source, that being the person who normally calmed him from such emotional fits that were an honest danger to himself, and possibly everyone else around him. It was something he knew thoroughly. In most moments, that was enough to cause a pain inside his chest and an added cautiousness in his actions.

“ _What_   _did you say?”_

Even to his own ears, his voice dripped with venom and the frigid anger that was so clearly displayed. 

The person standing opposite to him, shifting, changing, each as a reaction to every word spoken. 

“You want me to stop treating you like a  _damsel in distress_?” The growl began, a vibrant green beginning to crawl over white, muscular skin becoming more so with every second, beginning to rival armor. The fabric on his body stretching with the morph when anyone else would have expected it to be torn to shreds with how much larger he was becoming in comparison.

“Stop  _BEING_  one!”

There was a flash as the energy around the smaller boy seemed to somehow spike higher, a snarl coming from his lips — lips that were normally speaking of a joke, or whispering sweet nothings in the ear of the angry, hulking man before him.

“I didn’t ask for your help! I don’t  _need_  it!”

A scoff.

“Yeah? Then how come all I’ve been doing is  _saving your ass_?”

The snarled response earned gritted teeth from the opposing side.

The air around the young witch was practically vibrating with all the power he held back, his body shaking from both the power and anger, fingers locked in the flexed position seemingly ready to lash out at any moment. Both parties’ muscles, with close inspection, could be seen twitching in anticipation to retaliate on whomever made the move to act first. But no one seemed to want to make that first move despite the continued display of power. 

“Woah!” 

The space between the two was quickly filled as two of their teammates stepped in, each taking on a role to calm one of the two angry teens. 

“What is going  _on_?” Eli demanded.

After all, they had only gotten back from their first fight of the day — there was always more. No one had noticed a problem when they had been leaving the battlefield. Though, it had been awfully quiet. Maybe that should have been the tip-off.

“Get out of the way. This is none of your business!”

“You’re  _making_  it our business. Now explain yourselves, both of you!” The leader’s glare was enough to shut anyone up, though this was a time where Billy and Teddy were hardly paying him any mind except for the fact that he and Kate were in their way.

“This is ridiculous. You two look ready to tear each other apart. I know couples have lovers quarrels, but this a little much, guys.” Kate was glaring Billy down, trying to get through to him, or just to have him look at her. “Wiccan.” She tried, but the boy was still ignoring her as if she didn’t exist at all. “Billy!” 

“Kate, move.”

“Stand  _down_ , Teddy.” Eli was still in leader-mode, his voice booming and demanding. Playing friend wasn’t going to be enough for this situation. They were both too worked up. They were hardly listening as it was. They were nothing like themselves at this moment and it was honestly haunting.

Teddy took a step back, lowering his arms from the near fighting stance he had been in, though his fists remained clenched. It was a small step, but it had been something. At least he didn’t look like he was ready to tackle to Billy into the ground anymore.

“Billy! I am asking you to  _settle down_. You need to listen to me before you hurt yourself or—”

“Or  _what_ , Kate?” He asked, challenging her, daring her to say it. It was the first time his glowing eyes shifted to her. The only way she could tell was the way his head inclined towards her in stead. The magic had his eyes completely hidden in that moment. There was no trace of warm brown hues in the least within the sea of bright, sparkling blue.

Kate was not one to be intimidated, nor was she one to back down. Her eyes narrowed and lips pursed as she heard his challenge. She didn’t wait anymore. He wasn’t within reason. She had tried and made the proper effort so now it was time for something else. “Sorry, Billy.” She murmured it as he made a quick movement, her hand shooting to grab the boy’s forearm to wrench him to the side as she shot behind him simultaneously and with a quick jab, blue was flickering and starting to fade. Billy began to sway on his feet before dropping to his knees, and before he started his fall to the ground, Kate grabbed his shoulders and carefully, and gently, lowered to the floor with him to allow him to rest his head on her lap. She sighed, closing her eyes. 

Now there was a new task at hand. 

“What did you do, Kate?!” 

The snarling demand from their still angry half skrull teammate. 

“Settle down, Teddy. He’s just unconscious. He was going to hurt himself with that level of power building up! You know that as well as we do — just like you know we wouldn’t hurt him.”

For a few moments, there was just Teddy’s heavy breathing as he seemed to be working on collecting himself and thinking through each word that Eli had spoken, as if to verify that he was, in fact, speaking the truth. 

“Go cool off. Now.”

And he did just that, several more moments of glaring Eli down. He looked to Billy, as if to double check that he was alright — because no matter how angry he was, he  _needed to know_  that he was okay. And after he was satisfied, he turned and walked away.

——————

Opening his eyes again was a battle. Lids that were normally lifted without an effort felt as if they were nearly tethered closed, or attached to some sort of weight. Finally succeeding after a dozen or so attempts, he slowly brought himself to sit up, hand guiding itself to the back of the couch to aid himself in that attempt. His other hand was grasping his head to try and keep it from circling. He screwed his eyes shut and waited for the feeling to pass, taking in a deep breath and letting it blow out heavily. And as he opened his eyes again, he saw Kate sitting in a chair a ways away, still in her uniform. The only difference was that her quiver was now refilled with arrows. It made him knit his brows together in question but he had no time to verbalize it.

“You’re awake.. Are you alright?”

“Yeah. I’m—”

“Good.” 

Billy whirled around, looking behind him to see Eli standing a few feet away in the doorway to the common room of their hideout, Teddy standing behind him. Eli’s arms were crossed over his chest, and even with his mask still on, he could tell what the look in his eyes was behind it. His expression was doing enough for that.   


“You two are off the team.”

Both boys blanched quite visibly, their expression telling the tale of just what their insides were doing — flipping, twisting, and the like. It was nothing good nor comfortable, that much was clear. But nothing less was expected.

“That was ridiculous. A fight like that? Being that out of control? You two are lucky we were back  _here_ and not in the  _field_. You could have hurt yourselves, or someone else! Especially you, Billy.” His eyes were focused on him, and suddenly Billy felt quite small. “It’s bad enough we have to endanger ourselves to stop the criminals that run around the city’s streets. We shouldn’t have to do that with our own teammates. It’s unacceptable. We should have never had to intervene in something like that.” 

Each word was worse than any blow either of them had taken that day.

“That’s a distraction that none of us need.”

Or any blow they could have taken at all.

“Until further notice, consider yourselves benched.”

With that, Eli turned his head to Kate and gave her a nod, turning to leave without another word as his arms fell back to his sides. Kate got up and with a look to each of the boys, she just sighed and left the room. She was still visibly worried, probably wondering if it was a good idea to leave them alone, but there was no choice. They had a small situation to handle in the city. They didn’t have the time to spend there anymore.

Billy’s hands had balled into tight fists once more, and Teddy had crossed his arms over his chest. There was clear frustration over both of their faces, but Teddy’s expression seemed to hold a mixture with disappointment. 

“If you would just let me fight like everyone else..!”

“Don’t you blame this on me.”

“But this is on you. It  _is!_ You have to treat me like a kid in stead of an equal!”

“Because you keep running off to get yourself in trouble! Like a  _kid_ , I can’t take my eyes off of you for a second unless I want you to get hurt!”

Silence fell after the quick heated exchange and both were left huffing, Billy’s eyes - still brown, luckily - glaring holes into the floor as his nails dug into his palms threatening to draw blood, dull or not.

But unlike Billy, Teddy’s expression was beginning to soften. He’d let go of a lot of his anger during the time he’d been sent to cool off. No matter how frustrated he still was at Billy, and now reckless he was, he just didn’t want to fight anymore. Both of them were set in their ways, but there had to be a compromise or something they could work out to make this just a little bet—

“You just can’t trust me.”

The calm was all but erased and he felt the burning heat of anger flaring up once more.

“Are you kidding me, Billy?!”

The brunette darted up from his seat, ignoring the head rush that came with it, now facing the blonde that stood in the doorway, glaring him down. “You can’t! None of you can! But it’s you, especially. You either think I can’t take care of myself, or if I try to, that I’ll get somebody killed! I’ll lash out or lose control!”

His jaw was clenching in his silence, fists shaking at his sides. 

“No one thinks that! Would you quit it?! You’re making it sound like you don’t trust  _us_!”

“Even before! Kate and Eli were  _afraid_  of me. That’s why she knocked me out. She was afraid that I would lash out and hurt someone here. But I had  _control_. I knew what I was doing. I know my limits and I sure damn well know my own power!”

“No, Billy. You weren’t in control. Your magic was flaring up too much. They were being careful. That has nothing to do with this, anyway! Would you just listen?!”

“It has everything to do with this!” Came his roar of retaliation. “They’re afraid. Everyone is. Because none of you trust me! You think I’ll make the same mistake my mother did. Or worse. Ever since they found out just how strong I was.. It wasn’t just them. Even the Avengers. All of them are afraid — it’s easy to tell every single time they see me fight. So this is just their excuse! The fight today, just seeing me angry, it was their chance to just get me out because they can’t trust that when I say I have control that I do! So they just.. want me out.”

All of this was too much. It was making his blood boil. How could he be thinking like this? They trusted him. He couldn’t deny that even he got a little angry every time the Avengers seemed to watch Billy a little too closely when he fought, but their team, The Young Avengers, they trusted Billy. They really did.. _He_  really did. How could he not trust  _him_  on that?! “No, that’s not—”

But Billy wasn’t hearing him. “I knew this would happen.”

Damn it. Would he just listen?! This wasn’t about him! Not like that. He was looking for the worst in all of this. He was looking for things that weren’t there. He was the cause of all of this happening to begin with. He wasn’t listening!

“The only one who is making you the victim here is you! You’re doing this!”

Across the room, the witch flinched as if he had been stricken, eyes a fraction wider than they had been as he had glared, he suddenly pulled himself into a calm composure. His eyes spoke of how much strength it took to quiet himself and let as little on as possible. Looking off to the side, he bit his lip, feeling his nose begin to burn and eyes begin to prickle in the slightest. “..Guess you’re right.” As if it was an easy agreement, as if he didn’t care. He closed his eyes, a light blue wrapping around him.

“No, Bee, wait. I didn’t—”

But as he took a step forward, wanting to reach out, the light brightened before disappearing, along with Billy. 

“Billy!” But he was already gone, leaving no way for Teddy to be heard. Gritting his teeth once more, he felt his body begin to tense as a string of curses built up in his throat. “Goddammit Billy!” It took everything he had not to whirl around and devalue the wall behind him with a new hole, courtesy of his fist. In stead, he ran off, deciding to spend his time looking for his runaway boyfriend. He didn’t get to end the fight like that.

——————

Knees pulled to his chest, he had one arm draped over the top of his knees while the other was over his eyes, index finger pressing over his eyebrow, thumb pressing against the corner of his eye. Every now and then, he couldn’t help a small sniffle as he fought the tears. He couldn’t help this. He couldn’t help just how horrible the feeling was inside of his chest. This wasn’t what he had wanted. But they didn’t get it. They didn’t  _see_  their faces each and every time he summoned his magic, and really used it. They had encouraged it so much before, but now that they knew just how strong he was.. He was terrified that he was going to lose his place with them. He had just gotten it. He didn’t want to lose his friends, his place where he felt he belonged. He didn’t have that anywhere else. Of course he had his home with his family, and they were wonderful, but it was different. He needed more than that. The rest of the world felt so against him without their group. When he wasn’t helping people, doing something extraordinary. He felt as if he was actually useful, and not just the “school fag” that just happened to say something to get himself in further trouble with the wrong people.

He wasn’t looking to see fear in the eyes of those that ever stood opposite of him, because he never showed fear when he was the one being beat down. It wasn’t that he didn’t feel it either, though he knew Teddy wanted him to feel a little more fear so that he would be more careful, he just didn’t want to be weak in any other ways. He wasn’t that strong as it was, not physically. He just had his powers. And it wasn’t a “just” in the sense that they weren’t enough, but it was all he had. He was fine with that, but when people were scared of the one thing he had, and wanted to restrict that, it was a horrible feeling. It left him feeling so conflicted, because a part of him almost didn’t want to use it because he couldn’t stand the way they looked at him, but he couldn’t just stand aside and go back to doing nothing, either. If he didn’t use his magic, then he would really just be in the way, and there would be no point in him being on the team. No one had ever asked him to not use the spells, but the look in their eyes did. 

They were waiting for him to mess up.

They were waiting for him to make a new notorious event like his mother, the Scarlet Witch, had.

This place was where he always went in a moment of crisis, or when he wanted to get away. It always had been his little escape in the world, and always would be. After all, this was where he had met the Scarlet Witch for the first time. This was where he had gotten the first chance at his powers. It was his starting place, and often it would make him feel like having a starting place like this was enough. That he was supposed to be doing this and he had to go on. It just took a little while to feel better. But he had been encouraged that day. There was a reason for that. Right now, though, he was really struggling. He wanted to trust his friends and believe them when they said they trusted him. He wanted Teddy to actually be right when he said that he was the one doing this — he was just making himself out to be the victim when things weren’t really that way at all. 

Because he could figure out a way to fix himself. 

He really could.

But if Teddy was wrong, and he was right, how could he get his friends to trust him? What else could he do that he hadn’t already done? 

The ache in his chest reminded him that he had no answer.

——————

Upon first leaving, he had only taken a moment to wonder about where Billy would go. He highly doubted that he would go home. It would bring up too many questions from his parents about what had happened, why he was upset, and then would require a full story. Even he didn’t want to talk about it, and there was still too much to be said. He had to get Billy to stop being so  _childish_. He was the one who was going on about a lack of trust when his whole argument gave clear insight to a lack of trust in the whole team. Playing victim wasn’t going to make any of this better and it wasn’t going to get him any sympathy. What he was doing was just making Teddy mad.

Ruling out home, there was only one other place that was high on the list of possibilities which he would choose to retreat to. So he took off without another word or thought. 

By the time he arrived, the sight of the boy sitting a ways away reminded him of the flare inside his chest that still wasn’t settled. Their “discussion” was still open. As he approached, determined, frustrated, and a bit tired, he opened his mouth to speak, calling him on his poor exit choice earlier, he practically snapped his mouth shut, nearly biting his tongue.

One single thing had stopped him in his tracks.

The sound of a shaky sniffle. 

Suddenly all feelings and emotions that had been pointed at Billy to lay blame were being shifted to himself. His stomach dropped to the ground and as his anger was rushed out, guilt took it’s place. As if the sniffle wasn’t enough, the quiet murmurs that he soon heard amplified everything tenfold. 

_“I’m sorry. I didn’t want to ever hurt anyone. I don’t want anyone to be scared of me. I don’t want to be looked at like I’m the bad guy. I didn’t want this much power. I just wanted enough to be strong, to protect someone. I didn’t want to be weak anymore. I wanted to be able to_ do  _something. But.. It’s my fault.”_

Teddy edged closer, taking careful and quiet steps to approach. He didn’t want to scare him, knowing that if he approached Billy wrong, he would run again. If he did, Teddy would have much less of an idea as to where he would run to next. But the blonde paused once more as he watched the boy’s body tremble before him at his place on the bench as he continued to mutter to himself. Even from this angle, he could catch the way he used the sleeves of his sweatshirt — he must have used a spell to change, he noted — to wipe his eyes and fidget nervously with them as he continued to sniffle with a now stuffy nose. 

_“I should have just listened. My friends are good. They’re the best team anyone has. And I’ve got the best boyfriend that I, in stead, yelled at. I got him so mad. Idiot! I’m such a stupid idiot. He was just looking out for me. He was right. Idiot!”_

The sight was enough to make his heart physically ache inside his chest as he finally spoke up. “Bee..” He watched Billy’s head raise just a fraction, though he didn’t move to face him. Teddy placed a hand on his shoulder as he rounded the bench to sit beside him, though still giving him room in fear that he would still run if he didn’t handle him carefully in this moment. “It’s alright.” His hand moved to settle on the other boy’s face for a moment as he wiped a few more tears away, offering a sad but loving smile. 

“No.” He murmured with a hiccup, shaking his head. “You were right.”

“It’s okay, Bee.” 

“No it isn’t!” His snap caught Teddy off guard, and he jumped back a bit, looking down to Billy to search his expression, but he just seemed desperate. There was no part of him left that was angry.

“It isn’t okay, Teddy.. And don’t agree with that too!”  


A fond smile was his only response as he wrapped an arm around Billy’s shoulders and pulled him close. “Okay. So what isn’t okay, then?”

“…What I said. What I did. I’m sorry.”

Teddy just rubbed Billy’s shoulder through his sweatshirt, pressing his lips to his temple. “I love you, Bee. I promise that we aren’t afraid of you. We trust you.  _I_ do.”

Closing his eyes, tears beginning to dry, he rested his head on Teddy’s shoulder, burying his face in the crook of his neck, muffling his reply although Teddy understood perfectly by now. “I love you too.” They remained like that for a while, sitting as Billy continued to calm the intermittent hiccups that had resulted from how upset he had been. 

“So,” Teddy began, still rubbing Billy’s arm, though he was calm by now. At this point, he was just trying to cheer him up again. “since we’re suspended from the team, how do you want to spend the time?”

Billy didn’t seem to keen on talking again just yet, so he shrugged without a response, seemingly content buried where he was. 

“Think I could take you out for once? Just a little time away for us?”

He felt Billy half-smile against the skin of his neck, beginning another muffled response that tickled a bit as he spoke.

“I could agree to that..”


End file.
